One of the best things about Stoic philosophy is how relevant its 2,000-year-old teachings still are today.
Timeless wisdom like “If it is not right, do not do it; if it is not true, do not say it” and “While we wait for life, life passes” never go out of style.
But one thing Marcus Aurelius and Seneca couldn’t have predicted was the rise of social media. They never had to deal with Twitter debates or the pressure of getting likes on Instagram.
That said, the Stoics understood that humans are social by nature. Many of their ideas about social interactions still apply today, even in the age of Facebook and TikTok.
Aristotle—who had some disagreements with the Stoics—hit the nail on the head when he said:
Man is by nature a social animal.
Since the Stoics believed in living “in accordance with Nature,” being social was important to them.
Speaking of social networks, by the end of 2017, Facebook had 2.2 billion monthly users, while Twitter had 330 million. That’s a lot of people being social.
Or is it?
If you’re checking in everywhere you go, posting only selfies, or ending every other status update with “rant over!!!”, are you really being social?
That’s not a judgment—just an observation that might actually improve your experience online.
When you hit post, what’s the first thing you think? Probably something like, “I hope people like this.”
A “like” gives you a small dopamine hit. It feels good. But before that comes anxiety—What if no one likes it? What if someone makes fun of it? Even one negative comment can sting.
And that anxiety isn’t just about posting. Maybe you rarely post but spend hours scrolling through other people’s updates. If you’ve ever thought, Wow, everyone else’s life is so much better than mine, keep this in mind:
A fifth of young people admit that their online profile doesn’t reflect their real life, and that they’ve even started misremembering past events based on their own exaggerations.
So, what would Marcus Aurelius say? Probably this:
The happiness of those who want to be popular depends on others; the happiness of those who seek pleasure fluctuates with moods outside their control; but the happiness of the wise grows out of their own free acts.
Meditations 6.51
By focusing on likes and comments, you’re letting others control your mood—giving them the power to drip-feed you dopamine. Don’t outsource your self-esteem.
Instead of always seeking validation, try giving more. As Marcus Aurelius put it:
Men exist for the sake of one another.
Meditations 8.59
So next time you’re about to post a selfie, consider sharing something else instead:
- An inspiring quote or idea
- A product you genuinely recommend
- Useful advice in an area where you have real expertise
Even if these posts don’t get as many likes, you can feel good knowing they might actually help someone. That’s a better measure of value than a thumbs-up.
Of course, sharing a funny meme isn’t a bad thing! Making someone laugh is a positive impact. But if all your posts are memes and selfies, you might want to mix it up a bit.
The goal isn’t to force positivity or fake happiness, just to make small improvements in ourselves that might inspire others to do the same. Post a selfie now and then—just not every day.
As Ralph Waldo Emerson put it:
Moderation in all things, especially moderation.
And if you already try to use social media in a meaningful way but dislike what you’re seeing from others, just keep leading by example. Or, you know… block them. 😊
Let’s give the last word to Marcus:
The happiness and unhappiness of the rational, social animal depends not on what he feels but on what he does; just as his virtue and vice consist not in feeling but in doing.
Meditations 9.16
